Fallen (Part 12)
James tucked the blankets around Justin’s shivering body and laid a gentle had on his forehead. "You rest now. You need to sleep."
James’ words went unheard for Justin’s eyes had already drifted closed. As James pulled his hand away, he looked down at Justin’s face, so peaceful in sleep. He knew it wouldn’t look that way for long. Soon the nightmares would begin and the beautiful face would contort in remembered pain. Soon after that, the nightmares would become too much and Justin would wake up screaming and crying, pushing away things that only he could see.
James shook his head sadly, wishing that he could do something to make Justin’s sleep restful, wishing that this time the pattern would change. But the pattern had been repeating itself for hours now and he knew that all he could do for Justin was to be here for him when he woke.
With a soft sigh he allowed his own weary eyes to close. He hadn’t slept since Christopher led them to Justin; hadn’t slept all night and now all this new day, wanting to be awake and alert when Justin needed him. But now he was so very tired. If he just closed his eyes for a few minutes…surely there would be no harm in that? He was confident that he would not fall asleep, only that he would be resting his eyes for a few moments.
Within seconds he had drifted into the twilight zone that comes right before true sleep. Just as he was about to slip deeper into sleep, his ears picked up a small noise. He came awake instantly, his red-rimmed eyes focusing on Justin with worry. He was surprised to see that Justin was still sleeping and that it appeared that he hadn’t moved.
He turned his head to find the source of the sound and saw that Lord Joshua was standing only a few feet away from him.
He unconsciously narrowed his eyes as he stared at the cruel man. "What do you want?" he asked.
Lord Joshua did not answer him. Instead he looked over at Justin with curiosity in his eyes. "How is he?"
James forced his anger down, swallowing it like bitter medicine. "He’s frightened. He’s in pain. He is not well," he said bluntly.
Lord Joshua nodded as if he expected the answer. Not once did any hint of sympathy cross his face. "I want him back in my bedchamber tonight and I want you and your brother gone by morning."
James stood up to face the other man. "Surely you do not intend to touch him again!" he asked incredulously.
"You have no right to question me, James. I do appreciate everything that you and your brother have done, but it is clear to me that you are no longer needed here. I will take care of Justin."
"Like you took care of him last night?" James asked.
Lord Joshua’s face took on a harsh, angry look and James knew that he was pushing the other man too far. "Enough! You should be grateful that I am allowing you to stay the night." A sly look stole across Lord Joshua’s face. "Unless you would rather leave now?" he asked slowly.
Fear ran through James’ body at the other man’s words. He could not afford to be tossed out of the manor. Joseph’s plan depended on their being here during the night, otherwise, they would stand no chance to help Justin. He could not let that happen. He had to concentrate to make his voice sound humble when he answered, "No Lord, we would like to stay."
"Fine," Lord Joshua said as he walked over to Justin’s bedside. He reached out and caressed Justin’s bruised cheek with the back of his hand. James turned his head away from the parody of kindness, knowing that if he continued to look, he would lose control and strike Lord Joshua.
"Christopher will come to collect him later. I want him dressed and ready for me. Is that understood?"
James swallowed down the words that were on the tip of his tongue, the ones he really wanted to say. Again, he made his voice humble when he spoke. "Yes. Understood."
"Good. Oh and by the way…Justin and I will not be joining you for dinner tonight." Lord Joshua said as he withdrew his hand from Justin’s face and turned and walked out the door. James did not move until he was certain that the other man was gone, then he turned back towards Justin and continued his silent vigil.
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"Christopher."
"Yes Lord?"
"Go and get the creature now."
"Yes Lord."
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Christopher wrung his hands together nervously as he entered his room. His eyes scanned the room, falling first on Joseph and James, who were staring at him expectantly, and then on Justin. Justin was awake and sitting up in bed, his face pale and haggard looking. He looked very frightened and very fragile, as if one harsh touch would break him.
"It is time," Christopher whispered.
"Did you get it?" Joseph asked.
"Yes," Christopher nodded as he answered, his hand unconsciously sliding down to touch the sleeping draught that was hidden in his pocket.
Joseph stood up and walked over to him, then placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "You know what to do?" he asked.
"Yes, Joseph."
"After tonight, he will never hurt you again," Joseph said kindly, taking in the frightened look in Christopher’s eyes. It was nearly the exact same look that Justin’s eyes held.
"I know," Christopher said quietly, then turned towards James and Justin. He held out his hand and waited.
Justin looked at the outstretched hand and cringed. Although he trusted the quiet, smaller man, he knew instinctively that he did not want to go with him. He jumped when he felt a hand on his arm, and turned to see that James was looking at him with tears in his eyes.
"You have to go now, Justin."
Justin shook his head, although he was not really sure what he was negating.
James nodded and let the tears spill down his cheeks. "Trust me Justin. Trust me." As he spoke, he took Justin’s hand in his and held it against his own cheek. "You have to go, but I will get you back. I will."
Justin still shook his head, his eyes wild with fear and pain. His free hand clutched James’ shirt desperately.
James gave Justin’s hand a slight squeeze, and then he impulsively leaned forward and touched his lips to Justin’s. The kiss was gentle and whisper-soft and it only lasted a brief second, but James knew that he would hold the memory of it in his heart forever.
They pulled apart and stared at each other as if seeing the other for the first time. Later, James would look back on that moment and wonder how long it would have lasted, had Christopher not come forward and pulled Justin away from him.
"It is time," Christopher whispered as he led Justin away.
James nodded sadly. He knew this had to happen. He locked eyes with Justin for one last moment and then watched as he and Christopher disappeared into the shadows of the corridor. James cringed inwardly as the sound of their departing footsteps echoed against the walls. A few seconds later his shoulders slumped and he buried his head in his hands.
Joseph hurried over to his side and embraced him tightly. "This will work James. You heard what Christopher said; he drinks at least one cup of wine with dinner every night. The sleeping draught will completely incapacitate him."
James nodded wearily and lifted his head from his hands. His eyes stared were glassy, unfocused. "No matter what happens, I will not leave here without him," he said.
"I know that, brother."
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Christopher stood at his master’s side and poured the drugged wine into his chalice with a slightly shaking hand. He cursed his nerves and prayed that Lord Joshua had not noticed.
Lord Joshua did not notice. In fact all of his attention was focused on Justin, who sat on the floor at his feet. Justin’s head was bowed and he shivered almost uncontrollably. Christopher knew from bitter experience that the former angel was not shivering from cold, but from something far more terrible.
Lord Joshua waited until the wine was poured and Christopher had stepped back, then he leaned down and lifted Justin’s head with one hand while the other hand held a small morsel of bread to his lips.
Justin shut his lips tightly and turned his head. Lord Joshua tried again, this time pushing the bread against his lips with force.
"Eat, damn you! You have to eat!" Lord Joshua yelled as his temper flared.
Justin pushed himself back, pain distorting his features as his abused body protested the movement. He shook his head fiercely and said, "No" in as loud a voice as he could manage.
"No eh? We will see about that," Lord Joshua said as he began to stand. Suddenly he stopped and turned towards Christopher. "You were so quiet, I had almost forgotten you were there," he said.
Christopher said nothing, knowing it was safer that way. He could not judge his master’s mood and he did not want to make any mistakes.
"Go away now, Christopher," Lord Joshua said evenly. His voice held nothing of the earlier moment’s anger. Instead, his master now seemed very calm and controlled. This frightened Christopher more than anything.
"But who will serve you sir?" he dared to ask. He did not want to leave Justin alone with Lord Joshua, at least not until he had consumed some of the wine.
"I can serve myself. Go wait in the kitchen. I will summon you when we are finished," Lord Joshua said. Again his tone was even and controlled and Christopher knew that he had to obey or risk serious punishment. He nodded and headed for the door, praying for Justin’s safety every step of the way.
Lord Joshua watched the door close behind the dark-haired man, then turned his attention back to Justin.
"Now, where were we?" he asked as he smiled.
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The twenty minutes that Christopher waited in the kitchen to be summoned were the longest of his life. He tried at first to busy himself by helping the kitchen staff, but his mind continually drifted to what was happening in his master’s room. He tried pacing, but that activity did nothing to soothe him. Finally he gave up and sat down in a corner, staring straight ahead as he willed time to go faster.
When the bell rang for him, he sprang up - his heart beating so quickly that it felt it would burst from his chest. As he walked down the familiar corridor to Lord Joshua’s room, he finally allowed himself to believe that this plan was going to work. He allowed himself to believe that he would soon be far away from this hated place. He felt a lightness in his heart that he had never felt before and after a few moments he realized that it was hope.
He reached Lord Joshua’s room and knocked twice, then waited for permission to enter.
"Come in," his master’s voice boomed from inside.
Christopher opened the door and immediately sought out Justin. He was still on the floor at Joshua’s feet, his head now resting on the other man’s lap. His eyes were closed and he was weeping openly but quietly. Christopher noticed that fresh blood now trickled from his nose.
Lord Joshua petted Justin’s head as if he were nothing more than an animal and then turned cold eyes to Christopher. "Don’t look at me that way. I merely forced him to eat."
Christopher looked away. "I did not mean…"
Lord Joshua sighed. "Just get rid of this food and leave us Christopher. We will not need you any longer tonight."
"Yes sir," Christopher answered as he walked to the table and began to stack the dishes. He then picked up the chalice that held the drugged wine and looked into it.
To his horror, he saw that it was almost full.
His next words were out of his mouth before he could think to stop them. "Sir, you did not drink your wine…"
Lord Joshua sighed again, as if he were very tired. "No, this one did not afford me much time to enjoy my meal."
Christopher closed his eyes against the threatening tide of defeat. This couldn’t be happening. Lord Joshua had to drink the wine. Otherwise, how would they be able to sneak Justin out of his room? There was no other way. They could not harm Lord Joshua, for he would almost certainly take his revenge against James’ and Joseph’s family. There simply was no other way and Lord Joshua had drunk the damned wine.
"Perhaps I should leave it. You may want it later," he said desperately.
"No, take it away. My taste for it has gone," he said as his fingers ran through Justin’s curls. Justin shuddered, as if with disgust, but made no move to stop him. His eyes never once opened.
"But sir…" Christopher tried again.
"What has gotten into you today Christopher? I said take it away, did I not?" he asked.
"Yes sir," Christopher whispered. He went about his task, not daring to look at Justin any longer. He could not look at him for he had failed him. He had failed the angel. He had failed James and Joseph. He had failed everybody.
He hung his head as he walked out of the room, unshed tears stinging his eyes and blurring his vision. He took the plates back to the kitchen, entrusting them to the staff and then left for his room.
He opened his door with one hand and stepped inside. The other hand held the wine-filled chalice in a death grip. He stood there, too ashamed, too disgusted with himself to look up.
James reacted first. He jumped up and walked over to the other man. He stood in front of him and lifted his chin with his fingertips. "What happened?" he asked.
Christopher’s dark eyes were now full of tears. He could no longer hold them back and they spilled over unto his cheeks. He opened his mouth to answer, but only a small sob escaped him.
"He did not drink it," James said. It was not a question. He already knew. He knew as soon as Christopher had entered the room.
Christopher shook his head. He still could not answer.
James took the chalice from his hand and placed his other hand on the smaller man’s shoulder. "Joseph, take care of Christopher. He needs you," he said as he spoke to his brother. To Christopher he whispered, "You have done well. Thank you."
Joseph stepped forward. "What are you going to do, James?" he asked worriedly.
James stepped away from Christopher. "What I said I would do. Get Justin out of this place."
With those words, he walked quickly out of the room; the chalice still grasped tightly in his hand.